Managing Your Personal Boundaries 

Let’s start with an experiment:

If I shrink all the spaces between letters, words and lines, can you make sense of the following text?

Ifyourmainparachuteismalfunctioningorhasbecometangleditsimportantthatyou canbreakawayfromitbeforedeployingyourreserveorelsethereserveparachutemaybecometangledTogetinthebreakawaypositionspreadyourlegstoreduceyourvelocityandkeepyourheadupwithyourbackarchedbeinginthewrongpositioncouldgetyouentangledinyourmainchuteYoumustbreakawayataminimumof1600feettoallowyouenoughtimetofullydeployyourreserve.

Challenging isn’t it?

To read that text we need spaces. We need defined rules or limits, in other words Boundaries, to bring togetherness, clarity, meaning and ease. Let’s add the boundaries to the text:

“If your main parachute is malfunctioning or has become tangled, it’s important that you can break away from it before deploying your reserve or else the reserve parachute may become tangled. To get in the breakaway position, spread your legs to reduce your velocity and keep your head up with your back arched. Being in the wrong position could get you entangled in your main chute. You must break away at a minimum of 1,600 feet to allow you enough time to fully deploy your reserve.”

And if the text is about how to use the emergency parachute then boundaries can also bring key safety information!

So good boundaries help us connect and at the same time feel safe. The better we are at managing our own boundaries and the impact of other’s boundaries on us, the more satisfying our lives will be. Simply said but not that easily done because many factors are involved:

1. Boundaries are difficult to touch or see.
2. Emotions and feelings are involved.
3. Boundaries have generally a cultural, social and personal significance (handshake or kiss and physical closeness in France, bowing and physical distance in Japan).
4. There are different types of boundaries.

We can identify 4 types:

• A person with Healthy Boundaries is adaptable, respectful of others’ values and will be comfortable with saying No.
• A person with Rigid Boundaries seems to show little empathy or interest in getting to know others besides what is needed, seems to show little interest in letting others know him/her or might have a black or white perception of the world. All of this leads to a sense of isolation.
• People with Porous Boundaries share too much personal info, tend to be dependent on how they are perceived by others as they are afraid of not being liked. Saying No is almost impossible.
• People with Trespassing Boundaries function in an “expand or die” logic where territory is important, being recognised or admired is crucial and making themselves “bigger” compensate for the lack of self-esteem or sense of safety.

Before you start being too self-critical, you need to know that we all have in us those 4 types of boundaries, that there is no right or wrong boundaries and that the context sometimes dictates what type of boundary we need to use whether we are aware of it or not. Think about it: would your boundary be similar if you are with a loved one or on the battlefield? If you’re on holidays or at work?

Our boundaries need to adapt: this is the healthy approach. Trouble starts when our boundaries do not take our environment into consideration. It is not a good idea for a prison warden to give a massage to an inmate or for a brain surgeon to be emotionally involved during surgery.

Other’s boundaries will have an effect on us. How do we know? By how we’re left feeling, thinking or by our own behavioural response.

The key to promoting healthy boundaries lies in educating ourselves about ourselves, by understanding the nature of boundaries which is what you’re doing right now, by trusting your inner wisdom, by growing your self-confidence and by using your support system like family, friends and professionals.

Identifying how best to manage boundaries, will you make changes to ensure you look after your wellbeing?

This article is provided by Toufik Messabik, Rehabilitation Officer with The National Learning Network.

Outdoor gyms: you have seen them, but have you ever used them?

If not, why not???

Free outdoor gyms provide access to fitness equipment for people who can’t afford gym fees. They are easily accessible in communal areas in local towns and villages across West Cork: GAA centres, hospitals, secondary schools, special needs facilities, private businesses and local parks. Outdoor gyms, made up of a number of exercise machines designed for adults, are becoming more and more popular in public places across the county. They often include equipment such as a leg press, chest press, a cycling machine and cross trainers depending on the size of the location.

These outdoor gyms provide an opportunity for people who can’t afford gyms to access fitness equipment. They also offer a range of other benefits:

• Exercise controls weight,
• Exercise combats health conditions,
• Exercise boosts your mood,
• Exercise improves energy levels,
• Exercise aids better sleep pattern,
• Exercise in this forum is more social as it is done in a public place.

There are a number of free outdoor gyms in West Cork for you to avail of:

• Bantry
• Skibbereen
• Ballyvourney
• Dunmanway
• Drinagh
• Schull
• Aughadown
• Durrus

You can access information about free outdoor gyms in your locality on www.outfit.ie

5 FOR 5: 5 Benefits of taking a Winter Swim and 5 places to take the plunge in West Cork. 

It may be cold outside but that’s no excuse to stay indoors. There are plenty of health benefits to go for a winter walk or swim for that matter. And where else is as majestic to go for a Winter walk or dip? None other than West Cork.

The benefits of swimming in Winter are extensive? Believe it or not, Swimming in the Winter:  

1. Boosts your immune system: For your body, a sudden and drastic change in temperature constitutes an attack – a good one however. Swimming in cold water for one hour, three times a week can have profound increases in white blood cell counts. This was attributed to the cold water being a mild stressor which activates the immune system and rouses it for action.
2. For an all-natural high: Winter swimmers often experience a feeling of wellbeing that’s so encompassing that it becomes quite addictive. The cause? Endorphins. Cold also stimulates your parasympathetic system, which is responsible for rest and repair, and this can trigger the release of dopamine and serotonin. These neurotransmitters are a vital part of keeping us happy.
3. Burns calories: We all know that swimming is great exercise but there are some extra benefits from doing it in cold, cold, cold winter waters that you just won’t get during the summer months. Swimming in cold water will make your body work twice as hard to keep you warm and burn more calories in the process.
4. Gets your blood pumping: Being hot brings blood to surface. Being cold sends it to your organs. Both extremes work your heart like a pump. The increased blood flow is extremely good for you as it helps flush your circulation for starters, pushing blood through all your capillaries, veins and arteries. Evidence also demonstrates that your body adapts to the cold with repeated exposure and this may improve your circulation, particularly to your extremities – no bad thing in the winter months.
5. Improves your libido: immersing yourself in cold water enhances the production of testosterone and oestrogen in men and women respectively. In addition to enhancing libido in both sexes, these hormones also play an important role in fertility.

So if we haven’t convinced you to take a dip this Winter, the beaches of West Cork are still an excellent opportunity to take a walk, go sight-seeing, take some photography or just bask in the stunning scenery our locality has to offer:

1. Inchydoney Beach: This vast, sandy beach, on Inchydoney Island, a short drive from Clonakilty, is one of the most beautiful to be found along this stretch of the coastline. The pale, unspoiled sand is backed by dunes and gentle rolling countryside. This dog friendly beach has two separate sections, divided by the rocky Virgin Mary Headland. The swell here can be excellent and there are good opportunities for surfing also
2. Warren Strand is a small sandy rural beach backed by dunes and situated at the mouth of the Roscarbery River. At the southern end of the beach is a harbour wall which protects the entrance to the rivermouth. The area around the beach has been designated as a Natural Heritage Area and wildlife abounds.
3. Owenahincha is an extensive sandy beach which for much of its length is backed by dunes. This area is a popular holiday destination with lots of camping and caravan sites in the vicinity – some of which are open all year round. Owenahincha Beach is a good surf spot and there is a surf school nearby. It is also frequented by kite surfers.
4. The tiny village of Tragumna is found about 5km from Skibereen, along the County Cork coastline. The small, attractive beach here is mainly sandy, flanked by rocks and cliffs which offer some shelter from the prevailing winds . A small island can be seen about 100 metres from the shoreline. 
5. Barleycove Beach, West Cork is a large sandy beach backed by sand dunes. The sand dunes were thrown up in the tidal wave that swept Europe after the earthquake in Lisbon in 1755. Today they have been partially eroded but they are protected like much of the coast round this area as European designated Special Areas of Conservation. The road goes to the east of the beach across a causeway bisecting Lissagriffin Lakes and at the T-junction you turn left to stunning Mizen Head.